How to Find a Therapist You Connect With
January 6, 2025
Written by: Kelsey Moss, Registered Provisional Psychologist, MACP, RYT
The decision to seek therapy is a courageous and significant step toward emotional wellness. However, finding a therapist who feels like the right fit can feel daunting.
This guide is intended to help you clarify the process, offering actionable advice and reassurance to make your search for a therapist more empowering and less overwhelming.
Clarify What Matters to You
Before diving into your search, take some time to reflect on what’s important to you in a therapist. Here are some things to consider:
Practical Details:
Do you prefer in-person sessions or virtual therapy?
Are you looking for individual, couples, group, or family therapy?
Is location important, or are you open to telehealth options?
What is your budget?
Do you need a therapist who accepts your insurance provider? This is where credentials/registration can be important.
Personal Preferences:
Would you feel more comfortable with a therapist of a specific gender, age, or cultural background?
Do you need someone who specializes in a particular issue, such as trauma, anxiety, or women’s mental health (psstt… Risewell Psychology specialized in women’s mental health!)?
Approach and Style:
Do you prefer a structured, goal-oriented style (e.g., Cognitive Behavioral Therapy [CBT], Acceptance and Commitment Therapy [ACT])?
Are you seeking a more open-ended, exploratory approach (e.g., Psychodynamic Therapy, Emotion-Focused)?
Would you prefer less "talking" without compromising progress (e.g., EMDR, Art Therapy, Somatic/Embodiment approaches)?
The Connection you Feel with Your Therapist is Important
Feeling uncertain about how to find the "right" therapist is completely normal. Therapy is a deeply personal experience, and the connection you feel with your therapist plays a significant role in its effectiveness. Research consistently shows the therapeutic alliance—the relationship between client and therapist—is one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes in therapy.
Remember, it’s okay if it takes time to find someone you “click” with. Think of this process as finding a trusted partner in your mental health journey.
Start with Directories and Recommendations
Begin your search by exploring online directories specifically designed for finding licensed therapists, psychologists, counsellors, etc. Some resources include:
Psychology Today: A widely-used directory with filters for specialties, insurance, and more.
Check with your insurance provider: If you plan to use extended health care benefits, check to see if your insurance provider has an online directory of approved therapists (e.g., Lumino/Sunlife).
Google/General Search Engines: Use keywords that align with the concerns you want support with.
Social Media: Believe it or not, many therapists now have social media pages, like Instagram, where you can explore their "vibe" and see if you're interested in working with them.
These can be excellent starting points, but extra steps may be necessary to find the best options for you.
In addition to directories, consider asking your friends, family, or primary care physician for recommendations. Personal referrals can be valuable, but remember that what works for someone else might not work for you—and that’s okay.
Search Strategically
Once you’ve identified your preferences, use specific search terms to narrow your options. For example, if you’re looking for virtual sessions with a ‘trauma-informed therapist’ who ‘specializes in anxiety’, these keywords can help refine your search.
Keep in mind:
Therapists are registered to see clients in specific provinces or jurisdictions. Most will list where they provide services on their website, but you can always include this in your list of questions to ask if you're not sure.
Therapists often list their credentials, areas of expertise, and therapeutic approaches on their profiles.
Check for professional licenses (e.g., Registered Psychologist/R.Psych. or Registered Provisional Psychologist, Canadian Certified Counsellor/CCC, Registered Social Worker/RSW) to ensure you’re working with a qualified professional. Titles and designations vary between provinces. To help differentiate them, some common ones found in Alberta are described below:
Note: Requirements listed above are current at the time this blog was written. They may be subject to change due to legislation/regulatory updates.
Create a Shortlist
As you browse, create a shortlist of therapists who resonate with you. Aim for three to five potential candidates. Pay attention to details including:
Their "About Me/Meet the Team" section—does their tone and language make you feel seen and understood?
Their stated values or specializations—do these align with your needs?
Set Up Consultations
Many therapists offer a free 15-30 minute consultation. Use this opportunity to get a sense of their style and personality.During the consultation, consider asking:
"What is your approach to therapy?"
"Have you worked with clients who have similar concerns as mine?"
"How do you handle feedback if something isn’t working for me in therapy?"
These conversations can help gauge how comfortable you feel opening up to this person. You can check out our post about how to effectively use a consultation here.
Reflect on the Fit
After each consultation, take a moment to reflect on the experience:
Feel: Did you feel heard, respected, and understood?
Thoughts: Did their responses align with what you’re looking for in therapy?
Gut Instinct: Did their presence feel safe and supportive?
Embrace Trial and Error
Don't be discouraged if your first choice doesn’t feel completely right at first, as the first session alone may not be enough time to gauge if the therapist is a fit. Therapy itself can sometimes feel uncomfortable, and it's normal to take a few sessions to find your groove. That said, if there are glaringly obvious signs of misalignment or your gut is telling you it’s not a fit, then switching therapists may be necessary. Ethical therapists encourage openness around this and will support your decision to explore other options. It’s common to meet with a handful of therapists before finding one that sticks.
A Note on Ethical Standards
Licensed providers are bound by professional ethics codes, such as those outlined by the College of Alberta Psychologists (CAP) or the National Association of Social Workers (NASW). These codes emphasize client autonomy, confidentiality, and respect.
You have the right to feel safe and empowered in the therapeutic relationship, and these codes are in place to protect you. If you're curious about what these codes entail, most are accessible online to the public. Beyond receiving insurance coverage for services, this is a big part of why regulatory protections associated with registered or licensed providers can be so important.
Final Thoughts
Finding a therapist you connect with is an investment in your well-being; it requires patience, curiosity, and self-compassion. Trust yourself and remember that you deserve an affirming and supportive therapeutic relationship.
With the right therapist by your side, healing and growth are well within reach. If you are looking to connect with one of our therapists at Risewell Psychology, you can learn more about our team members here.
